Character Profile A group of modern teenagers/young adults who act like they are accidentally trapped in a pantomime. Characters: SOUTH EAST, BROCK LEE, CALLIE FLOWER, MC MOON UNIT, BRANCH. Scene One (read for either Youth 1 or Youth 2) YOUTH 1: Nah... I’m not even gonna lie... this is low-key tragic. Actually, no. High-key tragic. YOUTH 2: It’s giving... abandoned storyline. Like we’ve just been spawned in for no reason. YOUTH 1: Wait, are we early, or is this just dead? Because if I’ve come out for dead vibes, that’s ragebait. YOUTH 2: Nah, this is definitely a setup. The man said it’s a big opportunity... I’m not seeing opportunity; I’m seeing unemployment. YOUTH 1: This whole situation feels... sus. BOTH: Sus. YOUTH 2: Right, but deep it, if it’s sus... someone’s cooking. YOUTH 1: Yeah, they're cooking. YOUTH 2: Because last time someone said they were cooking, we ended up in that pyramid scheme, fam. YOUTH 1: That wasn’t a pyramid scheme! That was a networking opportunity— YOUTH 2: You bought 47 smoothies, fam. YOUTH 1: They said it was an investment. And it was more like 67 smoothies actually. 6...7! YOUTH 2: Hold on, why are we actually here? YOUTH 1: This vintage menace told me to link her here with the crew. YOUTH 2: Vintage menace?! That’s a red flag already. YOUTH 1: She said it’s a big money opportunity. YOUTH 2: Money money or exposure money? YOUTH 1: She said cash. YOUTH 2: Now you’re talking. Actor Notes Less is more. Comedy comes from boredom. Deliver with flat, unimpressed tone.